Many men feel that a woman’s place in an intimate relationship is so much easier than theirs. After all, traditionally it is the man’s place to ask the woman out and to pay for the date. But upon polling some modern women this doesn’t always ring true. With the advent of dating sites and changing customs more women are taking the lead and asking men out. In some cases, they are willing to split expenses of the date or even pick up the tab.
With more equality in the workplace, many women earn more than some men. Some men aren’t comfortable with such a relationship and shy away from these women. But some forward-thinking men do not feel threatened by the woman in their life being the higher wage earner. In fact, there is a growing number of married couples where the wife supports the family while the husband stays home and raises the children.
Sadly, the divorce rate is increasing due to more women being career-oriented and less family-oriented and more fathers are gaining custody of their children. The Family and Medical Leave Act has made it possible for both men and women to accept a total of 12 weeks a year of personal unpaid leave from their job to care for a newborn child, an adopted child, a spouse, child, or parent of an employee without jeopardizing their job as well as some added benefits. To show what a victory this leave act is for all concerned let’s step back 70 years and look at the evolution of a woman’s place in a relationship.
In the 1950s Home Economics was taught in high schools grooming young girls to become homemakers and to cater to the needs of their husbands and family. The following excerpt was taken from a 1950s Home Economics book titled Tips to Look After Your Husband. Tip #1 – Plan ahead even the night before to have a delicious meal waiting on him when he gets home.
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Tip #2 – Prepare yourself. Take a few minutes to rest and refresh yourself. Touch up your makeup, fix your hair and be fresh looking. Tip #3 – Clean away clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house putting away toys, schoolbooks and paper. Run a dust cloth over the tables. Tip #4 – Prepare the children. Wash their hands and faces and comb their hair. Change their clothes if necessary.
Tip # 5 – Minimize all noise. Turn off vacuum cleaners, dishwashers, washers and any other distractions. Encourage children to be on their best behavior. Tip #6 – Don’t greet him with problems or complaints. Tip #7 – Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair and present him with a cold or warm beverage of his liking. Tip #8 – Listen to him. Let him talk first.
Tip #9 – Make the evening his. Try to understand his world of strain and pressure. He needs to come home and relax. Tip #10 – The goal. To make your home a peaceful place where your husband can relax and renew himself after a long day at work.
With each passing decade, the woman’s needs became as important to her as those of her husband. With the advent of better birth control and more job opportunities for women, their needs started to shift. More women were holding jobs outside the home and yet still felt the burden of caring for their home and children.
This created a need for women to expect more from their mates. Men began to be groomed to help more around the house and even get more involved in the daily raising of their children. Some women felt all Women’s Liberation gave them was the right to hold down more jobs. This built resentment and, in many cases, led to divorce.
Now in the 21st century, those wonderful homecooked meals are being replaced by takeout or dine-in restaurant meals. Dining out is no longer a luxury to celebrate a special occasion but part of everyday life. Comedian Joan Rivers was once quoted as saying “a woman’s favorite three words aren’t I love you but let’s eat out!”
